The Wolf
“A healthy woman is much like a wolf — strong life force, life-giving, territorially aware, intuitive, and loyal. Yet separation from her wildish nature causes a woman to become meager, anxious, and fearful. With intuition we are like the starry night, we gaze at the world through a thousand eyes. The wild nature carries the medicine for all things.
She carries stories, dreams, words and songs. She carries everything a woman needs to be and know. She is the essence of the female soul. It does not mean losing one’s primary socializations. It means quite the opposite. Wild nature has a vast integrity to it.
It means to establish territory, to find one’s pack, to be in one’s body with certainty and pride, to speak and act in one’s behalf, to be alert, and to find what one belongs to. It means to rise with dignity, to proceed as a powerful being who is friendly but never tame.”
~ “Women Who Run with The Wolves” by Clarissa Pinkola Estes
A Wild Woman represents the wolf, the howl, the awakening within herself that she’s meant for more and the other-worldly expansion is unlimited. As women, we are powerful by nature, not by brute force. Our wombs are the birthplace of nations, Queens, Kings, rulers, and countries. Our arms have carried history and our hands have rewritten the blank spaces where we were left out.
We are not below or above, we are powerful. We rise up, we fight, we bleed and heal to rise again– just like the wolf we cannot separate our wildness, our strength from our womanhood. We are one within, although we are taught to suppress it, we rise to find where we belong and where our Wild truly aligns.
The Expectation
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”
He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
From the moment we’re born, we’re told to follow society’s expectations, to ‘be a good girl’. We’re placed in boxes but told to ‘think outside of the box’, to speak up but ‘don’t be too loud’, to be a sensual lover but ‘only gift it to one’, to know how to act like a girl, a wife, a mother, a healer but we’re never taught to be—- WOMAN. We’re told to repress what gives us purpose and to find purpose in roles deemed important enough by the patriarchy.
When you came out of the womb you cried into the world, announcing that you have arrived. You entered this world with a list of needs ready to be met; hunger, exhaustion, connection, and warmth. You were vocal and expressed your needs as they came, but over time you were told “sit down”, “no, be quiet”, “girls don’t act like that”, “women shouldn’t do that”, “only speak when you’re being spoken to”, “when you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say it at all”.
Over time, it’s easy to become tamed by these powerful words, sinking you into submission and fear. Fear of judgment, rejection, disappointment, and misunderstanding.
These expectations can starve the wolf, the wild woman within you. If you continue to feed it negativity, doubt, fear, anger, and greed, it will starve the good, the self-compassion, and the kindness you have for yourself. The alternative is to starve the negative energy, the anger and hurt, and that takes immense and continued healing, which we’ll get to in a minute….
I invite you to take a moment and visualize how it would feel to release all the shame, the guilt, and the expectation in your life. Close your eyes and imagine all the “shoulds” that others have blanketed over you fall away, and only you remain. Take a minute and reflect on how that feels.
The Wild Woman knows that she can’t take anger with her, and that forgiveness is necessary. She knows to forgive herself for each and every time she minimized herself in order to fit into the mold of the world, and she no longer reduces herself for the convenience of others. The woman and the wild woman can never truly be separated. It’s never too late to step outside of the always known, to reclaim your wildest self. It’s never too late to stand and take the space you deserve.
The Wounds
“ Never wish them pain. That’s not who you are. If they caused you pain, they must have pain inside. Wish them healing. ” ― Najwa Zebian
Trauma shapes us in various forms, whether emotional or physical. It gives us the depth that we often shine out of, that we rise from and that we explode out of with purpose, passion, and vigor.
I firmly believe that 20% of life is what happens to us, for us, and we might have little control over it, but the other 80% is how you react and respond to it. It’s how you conduct yourself.
Being hurt doesn’t mean you can run away from hardships or that somehow life will ‘give you a break’ it’s just not how life works, no matter how strong you are— that’s the 20% right there. The other 80% is staying present, it’s understanding the ebbs and flows of life and how energy reacts to energy.
As a Wild Woman, you have a choice, you can remove yourself from the situation and reflect. The wolf in you can lick her wounds, drink water, replenish her body, and move forward. The Wild Woman isn’t interested in playing the role of the victim. You can set boundaries in clear, healthy, and strong ways. Boundaries act as a protective container that you’re in control of— controlling who comes and goes and what you accept, receive or reject.
Beloved, boundaries are vital to living in true freedom. The moment you feel like your boundaries are being disrespected, even if you are the one crossing your own, then remove yourself. Remove yourself and reflect on the situation, your emotions, and how your body feels towards it. Energy can always tell, and energy is always telling. Cultivate a deepened sense of connection with your intuition, this will allow you to stand your ground on your boundaries and standards.
Coming back to the two wolves you feed, others will attempt to feed them for you. This is where your boundaries and self-love will come out and growl. Wild Woman, you will not be silent, you will not be tamed or trapped. You have an innate knowledge of what is right and wrong and therefore you will not allow any negativity to be fed or forced into your energy field.
Once you’ve licked your wounds, inspected old scabs, and healed the hurt from the past, you’ll see it reflect in all areas of your life. You will strive to live a life of freedom and not be captured by obsession, anger, or resentment. Through this, you’ll wish healing on others instead of punishment for what they’ve inflicted on your soul. You will exude love and forgiveness and bless your enemies with intentions of blessing, kindness, and healing.
The Calling
We each have a calling, longing, and the desire to fulfill our highest purpose in life. Do not suppress your highest calling, your true self. if you suppress her, it will numb you to her magic and repeat patterns that continue to sabotage your truth.
Often times we might go through stages of trauma, healing, and exploration only to find we’re redefining ourselves and the newness of this role can be overwhelming. The pure and simple answer to why this happens is you weren’t being true to yourself, now your truth is calling out to be heard. When we silence this voice, it becomes harder to hear our own truth and confusion becomes a second, unwanted heartbeat.
The inner wild woman wants to reemerge. In our society today, many women feel overpowered, overwhelmed, undermined, and spoken down upon. This is why we need to rise up. Take our place in this world, take up the space we deserve as wild women. As wildlings of the Goddesses and Daughters of the earth. It’s time to release these old patriarchal ways of being.
The explorative energy that draws you to your wildest self is also calling you to open the door. To leave the passive, suppressed, doubtful, and fearful nature of self behind and step into your Wild Woman; stepping into nourishment, fierce courage, and thunderous truth. This step can be daunting, but you’re being supported by your highest self, your ancestors, and your pack.
I believe that with intention, support, and daily applications through rituals, the confusion, and energy of old will dissolve and you will only experience the energy of truth, wild and fierce sensuality with the confidence to step into that power fully.
The Key
What is the key to unlocking this door? To step through this portal?
Doing your inner work comes first, we need to look into the darkness and shine a healing light. You may have gone through transitions of reflecting, exploring, accepting, releasing, and ultimately healing, and it may feel like endless cycles of re-opening wounds. But Beloved, healing isn’t linear, it doesn’t happen in a day and healing needs intentional maintenance to continue to grow and flourish.
While you’re walking this path of healing you’ll cultivate a deepened relationship with yourself. These seasons are always paired with realizations, awakenings, and true understanding. That is where your inner voice, your wildness, and the truth is revealed. It’s in the acknowledgment of what you need to work on, being accountable for your choices, and without a doubt becoming more self-aware.
With your self-awareness you’re able to recognize areas of growth, stepping into your courage with newfound confidence. Having conversations with your fear and expressing self-compassion in the ways you’ve longed for. There’s no right “key” to embodying your Wild Woman, however, you are the only one holding the key. Give yourself your own key back, release yourself and unlock the freedom you deserve.
Here are a few ways you can put this to practice
- Practicing self-compassion daily
- Discovering inner love
- Spending time with yourself
- Intentionally being aware of the energy you give/receive
- Facing your fears with your truth
- Releasing the chains of the systems that have held you back
- Dedicating time to maintain your intuitive powers
- Practicing rituals daily to create magic in your environment
- Bridging this world to other worlds, connecting them only with the intentions of good
- Visiting other worlds while being grounded to this one
- Reclaim your wild by reprogramming your mind with positive, enlightening, and thought-provoking concepts
- Act on the spontaneous impulses you have that bring you joy
- Listen to nature, not others. Mother Nature is always willing to provide guidance
- Move away from being the talker, organizer, and doer; practice being present
The list can go on, and as you discover more of yourself, it will. You will find ways to incorporate your true calling into everything you do. The more you speak your truth the easier it becomes to be honest with yourself, and to act on what feels in alignment with your path. This doesn’t mean saying “no” to anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, doing things you’re afraid of is as much part of the Wild Woman as wisdom is.
You will experience discernment over decisions and as a Wild Woman, you will take time, grounding yourself and asking for guidance from your Angels, ancestors, and guides. Remember, sometimes our fears are guard-dogs to our dreams, acting as obstacles when in fact they are indicators that seasons might be changing, and we can flow and change with it.
When you step through this portal of transformation, you’ll notice what you need. Much like the Wolf that hunts in packs, preserves energy when she needs to, rests and recovers, and feeds the pack through intention— you will learn to intentionally feed yourself. You will know that you need to fill yourself up with creativity, dates alone, walks in the park, reading the book you’ve put off for how long, or finally signing up for the dance class you’ve been thinking of for ages.
These suggestions may seem odd, but it’s what sparks joy that refuels us. Ask yourself, what sparks joy in my life? What nourishes my soul and provides me with more of what I’ve been given so much of? What brings light to my day and lightning to my energy?
Honor these moments, honor your creativity. It’s connected to your womb, your soul, and your heart. Reach out to her through song, poetry, art, color, nature or the harmony of your laugh. Schedule time for joy, creativity, and rituals as often as possible.
Life is ever-changing and flowing, in order to flow with the energy we need to attentively and actively nourish our bodies, minds, souls, and hearts with what feels good to us.
The Pack
Connection is gold. It’s what allows us to exchange energy, and ideas, create a safe environment to support one another and be vulnerable with people we trust.
A wild woman has a pack, a tribe, a community, a circle of sisters that envelop her with support, warmth and love. Your pack may be three people, it may be 10, but pouring your heart into a community that returns the favor adds immeasurable value.
This also includes leaning on your intuition when you need to release certain connections that have been overpowering, toxic and disrespectful. As you become more loyal to yourself, you allow yourself to be an open expression of loyalty, respect and love to your pack.
Your loved ones will be honored knowing that you’ve made space for them, this connection is in alignment with your soul and every interaction is intentional and comes from a deep sense of love for them and yourself.
Your pack, the sisterhood that supports you, won’t act out of jealousy. It’s not the friendships that constantly find fault, but rather the friends that walk this path together in honesty, devotion and purpose.
The community that your energy aligns with, you’ll find growth there. Constant seasons of change but the connection relies on growth. Friendships that propel you forward and do not hold you back or drag you down. Again, this is where you focus on what wolf is being fed by friendships, energy and connection and make decisions based on that.
The Howl
She is wild because she needs to be. We fear wild women because we’ve been tamed for far too long.
Wolves howl to communicate with their pack, sometimes to protect their territory by warning off other rival packs in the distance, and they howl to their own pack members out of affection. Scientists have said that there’s a variation in howling behavior and it’s often related to emotions of love, longing and protection.
What is your soul longing for?
Is it to dance naked in the forest? To scream at the top of your lungs from a mountain top or to embody a flame and move with no pattern but endless passion?
When was the last time you howled?
Speak up Beloved! Walk your own path. You have this beautiful howl inside of you that is waiting to awaken from the depths of your belly, reaching up through your spine until it finally escapes your lips.
I invite you to rise up, despite the wounds you may still be licking. Infact, I invite you to rise up because your wounds have never looked more beautiful in the light. You have scars of stardust and stories of magic that need to be shown, told and carried through generations.
Howl into the moon, speak your truth and be willing to receive what your guides have prepared for you. Allow yourself to receive, wisdom from those you respect and honor. Be loyal to yourself, do not abandon yourself. With every step, pause and reflect on where your words are coming from. Are they from a place of self-abandonment or automatic rejection? Are they from people-pleasing or systematic oppression? Or are your words coming from a space of self-respect and honoring your truth?
Once you make that mind-shift, moving to feed the wolf of joy, happiness, peace, kindness and truth —- your language will change. You’ll accept yourself even in the form of words. Be kind to yourself, you have a fierce heart that still requires softness, gentle hands and kind words, embody that energy.
Howl for your body, your perfections because all your curves, lines, spots, lumps and bumps are brushstrokes in an art piece and as a Wild Woman you appreciate every aspect of your ever-evolving temple. You are a sensual and sovereign being, allow yourself time to play, dance and appreciate your body and others whom you’re intimate with.
Give yourself permission to be every shade of vibrant, every note of the harmonious sound and beauty in the world. To explore everything you have done and attempt the things you’ve never tried, listen to the whispers of your soul.
Listen to your womb, listen to your heart. They speak to you. The land has messages hidden, guidance and light that you can claim as your own when you connect with her. Work with the land, howl into the soil, bathe in her water and become one with her energy.
It’s time to howl. You’re a Wild Woman, unlimited in power, expansive in curiosity and growing in wisdom. You are untamed, unbroken, fierce, and WILD. It’s time to release any traumas and open yourself up to being vibrant with ancestral powers washing over you.
Your howl can take many forms, from lightwork to dancing naked in your garden feeling lighter than air. Your howl is beautiful because it stems from healing, depth and remembrance.
Divine Woman, you may have felt the call, and I invite you to look to your future, vibrant, powerful self and ask her this: What makes my inner Wild Woman howl?